The LA Punk Rock Scene - Why Are These People Still Alive?

Did you know the Germs got back together and are playing again, and there is a new movie about them? They're like 50 years old (my age)! Still up there playing like kids. Weird. Lorna Doom and Pat Smear look fantastic too, like they spent the last 25 yrs in a health spa (check this pic).

They look healthy (mentally and physically) and happy. Check out this pic and great interview. At 50, I've concluded that there's no alternative to those three.

No way can you keep up that lifestyle for long. Don Bolles had a hard life with drug addiction and alcoholism, but he's doing OK too. Darby Crash is dead, but they've got some famous actor, Shane West, to take his place. I was into that early LA punk rock scene, and I saw the Germs live on the last day of the 1970's at the Hong Kong Cafe in downtown LA.

The lead from 45 Grave, Dinah Cancer, is back playing again, and she looks great too (photo from 3 years ago), although she was on heroin for about 12 years as I recall. She must be 50! 50 years old and still running around all dressed up like a ghoul. Haha, Morticia, here we come.

She got married a couple of times and had a kid. I knew her husband Paul Cutler (he played in 45 Grave) - nicest guy you've ever met. I also knew Darby Crash a bit and my brother knew Don Bolles (he said Don was a really nice guy).

What's weird is a lot of those really insane, craziest of the crazy hardcore punk rocker maniacs were really nice people if you got to know them. A lot of them were on star trips - they could be like, "Who are you? I'm a rock star! Why should I say hi to you?" But if you could get past that, most of them were really cool. They weren't mean, cold, nasty, unfriendly, arrogant, or anything like that. Their fans could be real idiots though.

Lorna Doom (she is really lovely in this pic) is really famous for opening the way to females in punk rock music. I also knew Ann DeJarnett and the rest of the band from Mnemonic Devices, who later went on to release a couple of albums solo.

I also know John Doe and Exene from X and Gina and Jane from the Go-Go's (That was before they were hugely famous!). Jane was a really friendly, spirited, spunky, mischievous girl - feminine but not submissive, playful and happy. She looks good in a recent photo too. She's into straight-lacing, and some people think she plays at being dominatrix. The woman I met didn't seem like the type, but who knows?

Gina was kind of an anxious introverted type at the time, but she was really nice though. She still looks good today.

Both Jane and Gina, have gone on to acting careers and the Go-Gos still play around. John Doe of X has gone on to a very successful movie career. Exene still looks good too, and X still tours. Back in the day she looked like this, and this. Live, X was out of this world! I saw them at the Whiskey a-go-go.

I saw them in 1980 at the Cuckoo's Nest in Costa Mesa and they were already getting huge in that scene, but they were not on MTV yet! I was backstage with the Go-Go's at that show. They looked like this at the time - beautiful young women!

I also knew Chuck Dukowski of Black Flag when he looked like this.

Black Flag was a big second wave LA punk band, and at that time, the scene was getting dangerous - especially Black Flag concerts, because that really brought out the morons. I remember everyone crowded around while some teenage moron "did the worm" on broken glass on the floor." You did the worm by rolling around on the ground like a worm. If you did it on glass, I guess you got cut. I certainly never did anything that stupid!

Later that nite, I got into a fight with five idiot Nazi punks at once. Obviously, they started it. All I remember was flying in the air and coming down with a Heineken bottle in my hand. One of the scumbags was lying on the ground, the beer bottle was in my hand, and damned if I wasn't going to hit him in the head with it. Lucky for him, he kicked up with his legs and send me flying again. Being a 22 year old Peter Pan type, of course I landed on my feet.

Chuck's a great guy; really friendly, and he's quite intelligent. Last time I saw him, he was sitting outside a laundromat in Hermosa Beach reading Marquis de Sade. Haha! This is how he looks now. He looks pretty good too (new band), and he's a father with four kids. That's hard to believe.

Honestly, I was into that scene from early 1979-on and I can't believe any of those people are still alive. The whole scene seemed almost suicidal.

Hell, I can't believe I'm still alive. I drink two glasses of wine a day, and my only vice is coffee. I've pretty much given up dope, except I smoke weed once in a while (but haven't in some time). I work out, I'm a health food maniac, fast regularly, take supplements and herbs, etc.

Sexmaniacman On Seduction

Sexmaniacman just told me the following:

Hey Bob, a woman just told me that I have a take it or leave it attitude. I was interested, but obviously, I said, "Yeah, so what?" Then she said, "See? That was take it or leave it right there." I said, "Sure, I know. So what." Then she said that was what she loved about me (this take it or leave it attitude that she says she actually dislikes), and then mentioned how she wants to have sex with me.

For some reason, I thought, "Ho-hum, she wants to have sex with me, yawn." And I like this woman. But this "I can take it or leave it" attitude towards sex feels really liberating. Make them work for it. I'm a privileged catch and you have to work to get me. I think women really despise guys who crawl all around trying to kiss up to them and accommodate them.

I never realized I had such a dicky attitude, but I think it's the best. On the other hand, you should also try to be accommodating to others to some extent, and I do.

I'm reading this guy's blog here, which is all about picking up chicks. It's for young guys in their 20's who are upper middle class yuppies. Everyone else needn't bother to read.

I disagree with some of the stuff he says, but he does have some good points.

He says never complain about a lousy kiss from a woman. I disagree. You go to kiss a woman at the end of the date and she turns her cheek and lets you peck her cheek. Lean back and say, "Wow," real sarcastically.

Most of the time, that will get her back up and she'll start kissing you for real. If that doesn't work, make fun of her. Say, "You call that a kiss? Where'd you learn how to kiss? You don't even know how to kiss." But say it humorously, not angrily.

Women actually like to be provoked. It works pretty good to suggest they can't kiss worth a crap or they are probably frigid and lousy in bed. That's a direct challenge, and a lot of the time, they will respond to it by showing you, "Damn right I know how to kiss/fuck, etc, baby!"

The mistakes he is talking about are guys who don't know how to read women. You have to read women. You need to be an expert in verbal and nonverbal communication. I'm still learning this stuff every day, and I figure it's a Lifetime Course. I can't emphasize this strongly enough, because you really do need to learn this stuff in order to deal with women.

Here the guy asks his date to kiss him. I've always thought that's the stupidest thing in the world to do. Never ask a new woman if she wants to have any kind of sex act. Don't even ask your girlfriend if she wants to have sex. Let her ask you or take the initiative.

I've always just been a Rapist and an Attacker. I just grab at them or needle them with my feet or make rude sexual remarks. I always make a big joke out of it and I'm laughing and screwing around the whole time.

It's hit or miss that way, but I've had sex with scores of women. The only new woman you should ask if she wants to have sex with you is a whore. Any other female is probably going to say no, and they don't get better as they get older.

Generally, you have to wait until you get the proper signals that it's ok to assault her. You might have to wait a while. The signals might never come, in which case you probably don't assault her. Just figure she's a lost cause and don't date her anymore.

If you try to assault her and she pushes you away or threatens to call the cops (Yes, it's happened to me) just shrug your shoulders, forget about her, and then act mildly put out the rest of the night. She'll feel bad and try to make up for it. Act like, "Gimme one reason why I should date you again?" Not angry or anything, just "take it or leave it."

Assault can be very soft, slow-motion and tender, like a movie that's in slow motion, or you can just push her up against the wall and kiss her really hard. I've done both many, many times, and I do recommend this approach.

Bob, I remember one time I was out with this rock band. I was trying to screw the lead singer, whose name was Ann.

I won't give you the name of the band because there were sort of big around LA for awhile (she's still kind of famous and there are pics of her on the Net)and this might get back to me.

I just Googled her and it turns out that later she went solo and formed her own band and released some albums. She also played with some of the big LA punk bands. You can order her records on Amazon and some other places. She's still performing up til 1989, then she's gone.

There was another woman there, Linda, and I'd already had sex with her, but now we were sort of through. I think Linda and Ann were having sex at some point.

They were all a bunch of goth rockers and I was a punker with a leather jacket and an attitude. The goth guys were mostly fags or bi or might as well have been. If you were good looking, confident, cocky and didn't act like a total queer, you could clean up with the goth chicks, who were mostly bi themselves, by the way.

You just had to play this role of arrogant, old-fashioned guy disgusted by all the rampant homo/bi-sexuality in the scene. The chicks all thought that mean and horrible and disgusting, but then they wanted to have sex with you too, because you know, you were really the only real man around.

I was in the back seat in a car full of this punk band's members, and I kept reaching up in front and grabbing Ann. She was reaching back and we were playing games with fingers and grabbing or some shit.

Everyone else was talking and watching us like, "What are they doing, anyway?" I was partly doing this to piss off Linda, and she didn't like it too much. But she wasn't putting out anymore anyway, so I was a free man, and she needed to avert her eyes and shut up.

We were walking into this Denny's at like 2 AM and I finally realized how pissed I was at Ann. She'd been teasing me like this for way too long. As we walked into the doorway, I suddenly grabbed her and shoved her up against the wall and kissed her real hard. Then, just as quickly, I let her go and smiled like nothing had happened.

The whole party (the band members) was like, "Whoa!"

Linda asked with a weird smile, like I was acting extremely weird, "Sexman, what do you think you are doing?"

Duh. What do you think I'm doing? Ann acted like she didn't know what hit her, but she liked it of course. The guys in the band were like, "Whoa, this dude's hardcore, man."

We went to the table and everyone made sure Ann was out of reach of me because now I was a confirmed public assaulter-rapist, and they didn't want any more scenes. But Ann was smiling and chatting me up the whole meal.

It's good to give women orders too, Bob. Have you ever done that? Do. I picked up this woman in a bar once within like three minutes of walking into the joint. It was a place called the Anti-Club in Hollywood. It was 1985, the show was Christian Death, and it was too awesome.

Three minutes, I bought her a drink, had my arm around her and was feeling her up. We left the club for a while, drove around and sort of had sex in the car while driving around Hollyweird, then went back to the club.

At the end of the show, the date had gone sour, and she tried to ditch me.

I looked at her and said, "Hey, look, you don't understand. You're not going home with them. You're going home with me." Smiling the whole time.

That got her back up good. "Oh yeah? Who says?"

"Says me." Still smiling.

"Wait a minute. Let me try something." She tells me to stand up straight on the sidewalk and looks me up and down lasciviously for about a minute like it's some kind of test.

"OK," she said. So I drove her home from LA to Orange County and we managed to have sex in the car on the 5 Freeway in downtown LA going 55 miles an hour at 2 AM, which is always interesting.

She had the same name as my Mom. I told her that, and she acted disgusted, like, "Fuck your Mom, you wimp. Obviously you're abnormally attached to her."

Another time I had a new woman in my bedroom. I had her top off and was feeling her tits.

She whimpered, in this totally lame voice, "Please let me go home."

Obviously she didn't mean it.

I said, "No way, you're staying right here." Not real psycho-like, but firm nevertheless.

She was free to leave, as the cops say, and her car was in the driveway. At some point there was an argument.

I said, "Get over on that bed right now." Same way, not real crazy, but firm nevertheless. She was free to say no.

Of course, she scurried over to the bed very obediently like a little puppy. Then, later, at some point, she didn't want to have sex or something.

I just got out of bed, walked over to the couch and said, "Fine, if you don't want to fuck, I'll just sleep on the couch. You sleep on the bed. See you in the morning."

And closed my eyes.

Not two minutes went by and I heard this little bird chirping, "Come on over to the bed." You can guess what happens next.

So a proper mixture of assertiveness and indifference can sometimes work wonders.

I'm sitting here, Bob, thinking that I have to get rid of this take it or leave it attitude, but the major part of me says, "Who cares? This is the way I am, and I'm not out to kiss up to or accommodate everyone else. This is me and this is my style, like it or not, I'm not making any major changes to suit you or anyone else."

This Roissy guy is going on and on about alpha males and beta males. I confess I don't get it. What's the difference? Do betas get lots of women, or is that impossible? I have a huge ego, I strut around like a rooster, I'm cocky and vain, and I think I'm Joe Hotshot With the Chicks and King of the World combined, even though it's not true at all anymore. So is that alpha or what? I'm not sure I understand what he's getting at.