Advice to a 26-year Old Man

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Updated May 2:

At age 26, you can get tons and tons of sex if you want to, and you don't even need any money. Hook up with a woman about 28-34 yrs old with a college education. If you are a student, she will think that you have tremendous potential. If you are out of school and working but not making enough, at least you will be working.

You can actually make some money in your 20's, especially your late 20's, even though the whole world is united against you in making money since you are too young. It is here that you understand the war of the Old Men on the Young Men, and how it keeps young men poor.

A woman around 28-34 is at the peak of her sex drive, just about, especially the 34 yr old. Well, if you want to, you can have sex for hours a day or three or four times throughout the day. This is known as acquiring a Sex Maniac Girlfriend.

This age for a man is fantastic, because at age 26, some women are actually letting men bang them all the time who are not their husbands, and they do not even charge for the sex either, which makes no sense in Female Logic, as sex is usually a commodity to be traded to the male for money.

In many cases resulting in a female scam called "all her money is for her and all your money is for her."

And all this while you are not even married.

These women will hate you in a way for your lack of money and sex mania, but a man that age can easily have sex three or four times a day and even have sex for maybe hours a day, though try not to damage your dick if you do it. It might only last a couple of months, but it will be the best couple of months you ever had in your whole life. And you don't even have to get married either! Haha!

She will have other guys either dumped on the side or else actively going, and may temp you with stuff like, "This weekend I am going off with one of my other boyfriends. The BLACK boyfriend!"

She will accuse you of being an animal in bed, which will be a truthful assertion.

She will say all that you ever want to do is have sex, which will also be true, and that the only reason you are around all the time is to fuck her, and that is all you even care about. This may be true but requires endless deep contemplation and meditation.

She will also accuse you of being gay even though you are screwing her more than an army could. This assertion may be laughed at.

She will suggest that you hate women and that you have been hating them your whole life, even though you have been trying to screw everything that moves and has a skirt for years. This may set off endless worrying, but not necessarily.

Perhaps you do hate women, and if so what of it? It's actually a love hate thing, and as long as you don't hit them or insult them too much, it's pretty fun, and it's probably not even true anyway.

You may have potency problems or delayed ejaculation. The latter is most common, although delayed ejaculation can get to be a problem. She will note that since it is hard for you to cum, this leaves her wondering if that means you are really not attracted to her.

Actually it probably means that in your mid-20's, you are on a mission to prove you are not a fag called Operation Fag Disproof. The purpose of this mission is to have so much sex with women that you will actually prove to yourself that you are not a queer.

Even though you are not a queer. Even though only women still turn you on, whether you admit it or not. As long as the organ works, you're obviously turned on, and most gay guys think having sex with women all the time is nauseating.

She will say you are the biggest sex maniac she has ever known, and this is probably true. You may now wear the Sex Maniac button proudly. Soon she may dump you, maybe for being too weird or nervous even though you were screwing your brains out, and you should have been the happiest man on Earth.

You will try to go buy a new Sex Maniac Girlfriend, but they are sort of hard to find, and most of them are getting into the age where they are charging bigtime for the pleasures of banging them. But you will always have memories.

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